Work/ School Balance

So, I enjoyed my week off. I could sleep in, put away things in my new house, control my life, write, and not follow a schedule other than the dog’s because she’s incredibly routine-oriented. Life came back to me two weeks ago when I had to go back to work. That wasn’t fun. I went back to trying to play catch-up from my being gone. The life of a manager I guess. It was a crazy week that brought with it a crazy weekend last week.

So last Tuesday, my final project was due for my painting class. I am honestly too afraid to look at what that grade is. I know I didn’t put the amount of time into the class that it needed. I know that, but I had life happening. It’s not an excuse, but the truth. I honestly expected a failing grade and to get a notice that my next class, Advanced Painting, was no longer an option. I’m happy to say I was wrong. I was able to begin my next class on Wednesday.

Well, this past Tuesday, I woke up sick as a dog. What made matters worse was that my boss was on vacation. I ended up out of work for two days because of it. Working for those there while I was out was horrible, and when I came back, I had to play catch-up yet again and do the tasks my boss usually does. It was a difficult week, to say the least. One good thing is my boss is back tomorrow, and I’m feeling like a human again.

I planned to work on writing as much as I could. Instead, it turned into trying to manage school and work without pulling my hair out. I also still have boxes to unpack and things to move. I also have a house to keep up without the help of another person. To top it all off, I also have a demanding dog with issues.

Last weekend, I decided to take on another responsibility and get a fish. I now have three fish tanks, one betta, and a snail. I have to set up the larger tank still and get some shrimp for the smaller one. Why can’t I make my life less complicated instead of making it harder? I’m happy looking at Norbert the snail and Fishy Fishy the betta. I also talk to them. Fishy Fishy is the only one happy to see me though.

I also made an important decision. I graduate in less than 2 months with my BA. I had every intention of applying for my master’s and starting in the spring. I have thought long and hard about this. I’ve spent the last 4 1/2 years doing nothing but work and school with a few breaks in there. I have worked 40 hours and gone home to do homework. I’ve worked five days a week most weeks and spent the weekends reading, writing papers, or whatever assignments awaited me. I never took a semester off. In this time I have lost a lot of me. I’ve become the student/pharmacy tech/manager/dog mom. I have lost the creative writer in me. I’ve lost the goofy, fun me. I’ve lost the person who turned on music and danced around the living room and the person who would write, then stop and dance in my seat, then write again. I’ve lost a lot of me. I don’t regret my choices. I’m proud of what I’ve accomplished. I’ve worked hard and I’ve earned everything I have. Now, I need to enjoy it. I need to find what I have lost. I need to find me. I’m going to hope I don’t lose the momentum and I’m going to take the spring and summer off. I plan on finding a job in my field, something that isn’t retail so I’ll be trying to settle in with a new job. School and a new job may not mix very well also. I’ll figure it all out, but for now the next 7 1/2 weeks are going to be filled with work, painting, taking care of my pets, and moving.