Work/ School Balance

My life has consisted of school and work with a smattering of writing in there. The past two weekends have brought with them a temporary shift. Last weekend I was at Delaware Pride Fest selling books. Going to these events brings with them a life I used to have. It was a life filled with writing and editing and talking to people about my work.

Last Saturday was a blast from the past. I had 7 hours of my nephew and me selling books, prints, and stickers. Even though I didn’t make the money I normally do during Pride, it was still a nice day, hot, but nice. I got to hang out with my selling buddy and talk about my books. I don’t get to do that enough.

There was something else I did that was a blast from the past, I worked on an outline. Yes, that means I started a new project, nothing like I’ve ever done before. It is going to be a fun book and I’m going to love writing it. I have no clue how it’s going to end and I have no idea when I’m going to have time to actually write it, but I did something and it felt good.

Yesterday I went to a local comic con once again with my buddy. There was something about yesterday, I felt like I needed it. I needed to talk about my books more. I needed to surround myself with other authors. I needed to be there. I also wrote, not the same story, but I wrote. I worked on my Scarlette Gunn series and I enjoyed it. Something inside me shifted and it made me feel more me than I have in a long time. I also got the chance to see a friend of mine who I only see every few years. Another event where I didn’t make much money, but it was still nice to be there. I was meant to be there. I needed to be there.

Here’s the problem with that feeling I had and my shift inside that helped me immensely. It is short-lived. Today I have to finish my Word Processing class. I also had the work posted for the classes that start on Wednesday. Those two classes are going to be hard. One is Intermediate Drawing, which I’m kind of looking forward to, but it’s also out of my comfort zone. The other is my capstone class for my degree. That is a big class. That is the make-or-break class for my BA. Yes, I can retake it if I fail, but I don’t want to. I don’t want to have to retake it. So I have a very, very busy 8 1/2 weeks coming up.

Maybe I needed that shift to remind me of why I’m getting my BA. Maybe I needed to feel it to take some of the stress off of me. Maybe I just needed it to remind me who I am. I don’t think it’s a bad thing, except I think I’m going to mourn not being able to write. It had been so long since I’d felt like this I got used to the empty place inside me.

Then there’s the house. The house has taken over a lot of my emptiness and loneliness because it is something amazing going on in my life. I’m still playing the waiting game on it though. Everything is being scheduled and I’m waiting for the survey from the electric company. A life of work and waiting.